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September 26, 2014

Closure On The Past

Let's do a little bit of catching up today on what's been going on lately. Ready?

It's been just over two months ago when I told my kids that I had this feeling in my heart that we passed the test. Which test? The test of my circumstances. It was so clear to me as I felt the weight of my situations lift from me.

I told my kids,  "Dad is coming home" I felt that so strong to where I knew it to be real. Then Sis. Loe approached me and wanted to share with me that her family got to talk to Ralph and that his eyes watered-up as they told him they are praying for him.

We have an evangelist at our church and he stated something I believe. That when the man of God speaks God will honor what he said. I have clung to that these past years because Pastor told me God is going to bring Ralph back. Pastor Garrett told me that 6 years ago. And I have watched and waited, looking down the dusty road hoping to see my husband come home. Well, there at the end of altar service Pastor said, "Your husband is coming home." He said it twice. And this is another thing I believe that when God repeats Himself, He really means it. God knows that I believe that way and that is why it was said twice. I caught that as I listened.

Now, I am just sharing what is in my heart with you, today. I want to say out loud what I have seen God do for me and is going to do for me also.

Recently,  I applied for a job that I knew was to be mine. I went to the interview with so much confidence that I felt God already made the decision about it. After the interview I was told they will get back to me by Friday. Today,  I looked at my email,  checked my phone, and a friend asked me if I heard anything yet. No, I had not. She told me not to worry about it because she knows God always looks out for me. Praise God that is the testimony they see of God toward His children. My reply was that I'm not worried if it's mine He will open that door. Then this is what came to my mind, I believe God was opening a new door and closing the door to the past six years. Those years were hard and hurtful. I began to feel encouraged again about my interview even though I had not heard anything.  After work I checked my phone and there was the call and voice mail; which only said to call them back. I did and was offered the position. A new door opened so I could close the door of hurts.

One concern I have had over the years is having to renew my lease. Because when Ralph comes home this house will be too small for one more person. I have had to renew my lease each year or I had to move out. Well,  I never wanted to be committed to a lease. But today they said it will be month to month. So now I am not tied to a lease and we can move when we need to.

I want to post the draft-post I wrote about 2 or 3 years ago but I will wait for you to read this one first.

Like it never happened. That's the life Joseph lived after he was reunited with his family. The Bible tells us that God will restore the years that locusts have eaten. I will continue to praise even though I am still waiting for it to happen.

God bless,

I am still using my phone to post. Sorry no pictures just sharing my heart.



  1. Sis. Payan,
    I wanted to thank you for writing this very heartfelt and encouraging post. It's so amazing to see someone that has gone through so much, yet still have a positive outlook on things, as well as complete faith and confidence that God is true to His promises. Your own testimony has helped to strengthen my faith for the situation my family is in right now; so, I just wanted to simply thank you for writing your heart. Love you.

    1. You know I am prayingfor you and your family. It's not easy but this I can say for sure, God makes a hard time come easy. With out Him them it would have been harder to bear but with Him He carries us through it all. I love you Mary.

      Sis. Payan

  2. Wow, I know that God is blessing you indeed! Your faith is so inspiring. Thank you for your vulnerability. It is truly an encouragement to me!

    1. How can I say thanks for the things You have done for me. Things so undeserved yet You gave to prove Your love to me...

      I am glad to share my story with people who love God because they can see His signature in everything He has done.

      Jen, thank you for visiting today. I am glad that blogging had made a way for us to meet. God bless you my sister.

      Sister Payan

    2. My responseto Jen's comments come from the song, "To God be the Glory" written by Andre Crouch

  3. I absolutely adore that song too :)

    1. As do I. It is the perfect song for every stage in our lives.



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